Something I stumbled upon

I found this and I just felt that everyone should really give this a good once over before they decide not to use a condom....

"

Things I Have Learned from Children

A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 square foot house 4 inches deep.

If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

A 3 year old child's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape.

If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan and tie it to a paint can, it does spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 room.

You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.

When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit.

A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

The glass in windows (including double pane windows) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

When you hear the toilet flush along with the words "uh oh," it's already too late.

Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke (and lots of it).

A six-year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36 year old man says they can only do it in the movies.

Certain Lego blocks will pass through the digestive tract of a 4 year old.

Play-Doh and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

Super glue is forever.

No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool, you still can't walk on water.

Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

VCRs do not eject sandwiches, even though TV commercials show they do.

Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

You probably don't want to know what that smell is.

Always look in the oven before you turn it on.

Plastic toys do not like ovens.

The fire department in my town has a 5 minute response time.

The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

The spin cycle on the washing machine does make cats dizzy, however.

Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

60% of men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid. "

Olympic Reactions

Opening Ceremony




I don't even know if I can successfully explain how brilliant every moment of the opening ceremony was. 15,000 performers, not one person messed up. There were just so many intricacies that all added up to a perfect performance. I'm sure everyone, or at least most people, have only positive things to say. So I will try not to waste time by repeating them.

What I appreciated most about the ceremony was how much the director focused on harmony. Not only harmony between various nations, that one, of coarse, was expected. I am talking about the many other elements of the show that were so opposite, yet complimented each other perfectly. There was harmony between teaching Chinese history, and embracing modern culture. And what was MOST fascinating was the connection between technology and human performers that made the show so perfect. Trying to wrap my brain around the feeling I got while watching 15,000 beautifully trained people perform on an LCD screen the size of a football field, well it really makes my heart race.

I am almost sad that my family decided against going to Beijing with Dominic this year, but when I think about it, it's okay. Because I really could never have the audacity to say that I felt cheated since I didn't see it live. Lord knows I would've been balling in the Bird's Nest if I had seen it anyways. Of coarse I can't put a video of the actual show on here, but check out the slide show of the various scenes in the show, it will give you a pretty good idea of why I still have goosebumps a day later.

Michael Phelps


Wow kid. Really, you just jump in the pool and break world records for a living huh? Well thank you. Thanks for taking those four years, and turning yourself into this American hero that we can count on to keep it classy and kick butt every single time. You make us proud!

Commercials Duh!

Considering how BIG the Olympics are, you would think that advertisers would take a little time to make the commercials just a little bit better. I understand they are too completely different events, but think about how much people look forward to SuperBowl ads. Every year advertisers spend millions of dollars creating what they hope will be commercials that stay in the audiences' minds forever. Then they spent 100 times that to get a spot during the game. This is the American way, and it's beautiful.

Well, the Olympics are a big deal too. We are talking once every four years, 647 of America's best athletes playing against the best athletes from around the world. We are talking about the one time we can guarantee that all of the nations will come together for a common cause (I don't care if I sound cheesy, I really mean it). So why is it that I still see the same old bad ads playing on NBC networks while I'm waiting for rowing to come back on? I know the audience is different, and the cost might be a lot more than for the SuperBowl, but out of respect for this tradition, I think a lot more advertisers should make it a point to at least try to come up with better commercials to air during the Olympics (even if you just focus on the Opening Ceremony, it is a start).

Thank you to the companies that made the effort...

Visa



Coca- Cola



McDonald's




All of these commercials are great. And I highly doubt I will forget any of them. Brilliant.